Today is St. Patricks Day and I did nothing special towards the day. I'm not Irish and I don't drink and I absolutely HATE the colour green so I guess I'm a bit of a stick in the mud when it comes to St. Paddy's Day. Not to mention my husband is halfway across the globe for 2 more weeks. And yes I'm miserable about it.
I thought initially I would surprise him and book a trip with our youngest out there - but it turns out that it would cost us over $4K to take the trip for ONE WEEK. And that's literally just the flights. No hotels or meals in there. That's a stupid amount of money to spend for a week. AND a week that Paul won't even spend with us. He will be working the whole time.
No thanks. I'd rather save it to spend in Florida this summer when we go.
This week I have been struggling hard! Struggling hard with my mood, my schedule, and just the whole lot of it!
I hate when Paul is away. I mean a weekend is fine, but a whole week is brutal. This will be almost THREE weeks by the time he comes home. And of course, it all started on March Break! So I'm home alone with all three kids. Which, really, is just worrying about Kiefer. But Kiefer still needs so much from me and lately, I have been finding it overwhelming. I still make all his meals for him, I help him get dressed, and we schedule activities together (because if I don't he will literally be on his iPad ALL. DAY. LONG.)
March break started off with the family heading to Buffalo to do some shopping. Somehow, my children have all outgrown their wardrobes. Kiefer is now in a men's SMALL! Man, that hurts my wallet more than anything! He is almost as tall as me! CRAZY how time flies!
Paul was in a bit of a mood Sunday when we left because I found VAPE pen stuff in both Parker and Blaine's rooms. We have told the boys that if we find them vaping they will get kicked out. I'm not supporting that awful habit. Then I thought I had lice (thank god I don't think I do) and I could not find ONE lice comb in our house. At one point we had FOUR. So I was annoyed that someone took the combs and hid them or lost them. So Paul went out and bought me another one. I asked him if we should just cancel the whole trip. We decided to keep our mouths shut and just try and enjoy the trip. Sunday night was tense - and Monday morning was a bit tense with Blaine as he had a complete meltdown in the middle of a bagel place we went to that we love. He was getting overwhelmed by everyone talking to him at once and stormed out of the place. A few times, while shopping, he was getting overwhelmed as well. I managed him fine while also managing Paul. We had a nice dinner Sunday night at Olive Garden - Paul and my favorite restaurant down there. Monday night we had a nice dinner at Scotch and Sirloin - a very old-timey steak house. The food was really good. The boys quite enjoyed it and we all had a good time.
Then Tuesday we drove home and on the way home we dropped Paul off at the airport. sigh.
It's not as hard managing the kids while Paul is gone. It's not about the kids really. I find I can manage them better sometimes without him here. There's ONE adult so what I say goes. There are no conflicting messages or miscommunication.
I'm tired. It's almost 8 pm and I wanna go to bed. Every night I'm tired. I haven't been consistent with my working out and I'm kicking myself for it. I feel like shit every day. I sleep in. I am not working towards my goals. I do not feel like Krista2.0. I feel like old lazy Krista.
I need to get my butt in gear and get on it all. It's so hard! To keep on top of everything and stay motivated!
Okay this is one more 'to do' off my list. I didn't journal last week because....who the hell knows why!
So now I need to get my workout gear on and just do it! It's an easy one. Only because I missed yesterday and am moving everything forward a day. So I lose my Sunday rest day! WAH!
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