Being a good friend...

 

I am VERY fortunate that I've had some wonderful friends in my lifetime.  

My very first best friend was Marianne McColeman.  I can remember sleepovers at her house in her bunkie in the backyard.  Her Mom and Dad were so very welcoming.  She had an older sister and I was insanely jealous of her having someone she could talk to that was older and wiser.  We went to the same dance class together and along with Patty-Jo LeCollier and Shannon Garland, we were unstoppable.  

My next best friend would be Cari Rastas (now Van Niekerk).  Grade 5, Miss MacDonald's class.  We were attached at the hip.  We would remain friends all through high school and are still friends to this day.  We found ourselves in so many adventures and pickles...we added Julie Tjan along the way and were a threesome!  

I've made amazing Momma friends through my prenatal group.  Leanne Stirling, Cathryn Fallis, and Rachelle Atkinson.  Friends from the breastfeeding cafe, Megan Grewal, Geri Bean, Timea, Lori Bertoni, and Terri Newman.  

I've also made wonderful friends in the workplace.  Joanne McNeil and Tia Lember from Bulk Barn, Renee Frechette, Ashlea Theo, and Mihaela Mihai from SCI, Linda Middleton, Monika Bernolak, Alana Peterson, Daniela Pandza from Georgian College, Heidi Kostrya, Jodi Swayze, Daniela Moore, Karen Hansen, Mary Anne Moran, Melissa Dietrich (I could go on and on for Remax girls I love!).  

I've also made wonderful quilting friends.  Kathy McKim, Dara Murphy, Amanda Graham, Susan Nelson, and Judi Fenton.  

Then I've made friends through friends, like Nicole Stewart, Alda Tee, Carol Taylor, and Karen Schmidt.  

I am a lucky lucky lady to be surrounded by amazing and supportive women.  

I wonder if I've always been the supportive woman that I can be.  I know I have times that I have been very supportive - but there are other times when I seem to not even be able to handle my own life so I start to retreat and pull away from those friends who I could use the most in those times.  

I'm actually quite shocked at the list of people I have here.  I'm so blessed.  

I need to work on being a better friend.  Scheduling friend time, or phone calls or emails.  I 'forget' about friends and get so caught up in my own life - and then wonder why the phone isn't ringing or texts aren't coming through.  

I think I need to brainstorm ways to be closer to people and keep in touch more.  Calendar reminders, little note cards, etc.  

Door Knocking and Success

 

Why does everyone swear by door knocking but no one wants to do it?  

I just watched a YouTube video of some guy who started in real estate and door knocked for 6 hours a day...and he sold 10 homes in his first month.  

Okay so I admit I only went out once, but I got so many doors closed on my face and not ONE lead.  So it's a thick-skin activity for sure.  

I desperately want to be successful.  But I often think about the Erik Thomas video where he drops three truths.  

"1. When you want to be successful as much as you want to breathe, then you will be successful.  

2. To be able at ANY MOMENT, to sacrifice what you are for what you will become.  

3. Pain is temporary.  It may last for a minute, or an hour or a day, or even a year.  But eventually, it will subside.  And something else will take its place.  If I quit, however, it will last forever.  

I dare you to fail.  I dare you to write for a year and get to the end and fail."

They are powerful words.  And they inspire me.  So WHY is it that I feel paralyzed?  What is it that I'm afraid of?  

I'm afraid of looking dumb.  Of feeling dumb.  Of failing.  That horribly uncomfortable feeling of embarrassment.  

But WHY am I embarrassed?  I'm trying to get my name out there for business and I'm doing whatever it takes to get it.  So shouldn't that be something to be proud of?  So what's my issue?!  

I had a coach that said be my authentic self and if door knocking isn't it, then don't do it.  BUT the experts online and in person say it's still the best way to get clients.  

UGH.  

I feel spread too thin.  Paul wants me to be successful but he also wants me at home to play with him whenever he is available and free.  

I just don't know what the answer is.  The truth is - yes I want it all - and I want to work for none of it.  I don't want to diet, I don't want to exercise but I want to be fit and skinny.  I don't want to prospect, I don't want to door knock but I want to be a raging real estate success.  

The problem is the only place success comes before work is the dictionary.  I heard that once, and it sounded super cheesy then...and it does now too.  But it's TRUE!!

I'm going to have to work at things and I don't want to!  WAH!  

I feel like a toddler having a suck attack.  And guess what?  A toddler always calms down and does what they need to - eventually.  

So I guess eventually, I'll do what I need to.  

UGH. Why does work have to be so hard?  

Then I think, should it be this hard?  Should I love every minute of it?  Or just some minutes?  If you are following your passion then you never have to work a day in your life.  So what IS my passion?

I wish I truly knew that.  What makes me happy?  What makes me feel successful?  

Truth is, I don't know.

😕

Grace vs. Excuses

 

So I usually start each journal entry with a title and then a search for the perfect picture to start the entry off.  I am a very visual person and sometimes the pictures actually inspire some more of my writing.

I wasn't really prepared for what I found here.  

Wow, some powerful stuff.  

I've fallen off my diet/exercise routine.  It's been slipping for awhile and I allowed myself to slip because I thought I was giving myself 'grace'.  But 'grace' quickly turned into fries and chicken fingers and about a dozen lemon squares.  

So I started to wonder...when does 'grace' turn into an excuse.  

After finding this visual and really thinking long and hard about it, I believe I was giving myself excuses.  A way out of what was hard and difficult to do.  

But now, looking back at a week of 'excuses', I can move FORWARD with grace or decide to quit.  And really what does quitting accomplish?!  

There's more here to unpack, but I'm so very tired lately so I'm going to lie down for a nap.  I know I'll regret it - but sometimes you gotta.  😴

I don't want to write

 

I almost always have something to write about.  

It's past midnight on Monday night.  I had a nap today.  Man, that felt good!!  I booked a doctor's appointment for Thursday because I just can't handle these periods anymore.  They are ridiculous.  I bleed through an ULTRA (after super and super plus) tampon and super plus pad in less than an hour the first couple of days of my period.  It does slow down but those first couple of days.  And try having your first couple of days of your SUPER heavy flow period when you have to be on a plane for over 8 hours.  Get up every hour to change your tampon in the world's smallest bathroom?  Or how about when it's an overnight flight and you fall asleep and then bleed through it all - including your pants.  

It's NOT COOL.  Not cool at all.  

So I'm getting a referral back to my OBGYN.  Hopefully, there is a solution that will get rid of periods once and for all.  I'm not having any more kids.  I'm done.  Sadly.  So let's move on with this BLOODY (literally) pain in my ass and get rid of it.  Can we not??

I went to Buffalo with Linda and picked up my new planner.  I'm SOOO excited to start using it!!  I am sort of using both planners this week as I transfer over but we have a FOUR DAY weekend with Easter coming up so I'm super excited to have lots of time at home with my boys and my hobbies.  It will be fun.  

Tomorrow I have an extremely busy day.  I think I have overscheduled myself.  

Parker bought me a hot wheels car that is sponsored by the national federation of the blind.  The packaging has brail on it and so does the car.  The car is all white.  Kind of funny.  I guess it doesn't need to be a colour if the person playing with it is blind.  

I really love it because I love knowing and standing up for the rights of the differently abled.  I liked doing a lot of the work at Georgian College that involved AODA compliance.  Accessibility for Ontarians with Disabilities.  Perhaps it's because I have a son with disabilities and I never want him to be held back because the world couldn't cater to his needs.  I will change the world for him.  

Well I guess I did write some stuff even for not wanting to write anything.  That's the point.  Whatever little things are bouncing around in my head - get out and I can think and be more present because what was bouncing around is now out.  

I've done my planning.  I've made my lists.  Now time to sign off, do a little meditation and hop into bed with my wonderful hubby.

Peace

✌