Back at it...And looking to change!

I've decided something needs to change.  

What is the definition of insanity?  

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

At least in the words of Albert Einstien.  

I'm feeling frustrated and stuck, and yet, I seem unwilling to change anything.  

My approach towards life seems to be very 'reactive' instead of 'proactive'.  I started the year thinking I would watch a motivational video each morning - I would stoke the fires of 'desire to change' each morning and hopefully that would keep the fire burning.  

Only I stopped (did I even start?) doing the videos and the fire is dead.  Like pretty sure there are weeds growing where the fire used to be.  

So get out the weed killer, and find the kindling because I'm BURNING to make some changes.  

So what do I want to change?  

Let's start with what makes me happy.  

1. Music - either listening to it or making (singing) it.  
2. Writing - in my blog, journal or just about anything.  I enjoy mental mind dumps...
3. Taking pictures and videos - I love looking back on old videos of the kids and there really aren't enough of them.  
4. My kids (usually 😉) - I love hanging out with them (when they aren't fighting) so I need to do that more - play more games.  
5. Meditation/prayer - I feel like it grounds me.  I've paid for 2 years of headspace and really only used the 'sleep' meditation consistently.  
6. Sewing - I love creating.  And I hate feeling like I'm 'behind' which I often do with sewing.  

So I wanna start each day with what makes me happy.  Or make sure each day has a significant amount of what makes me happy in it.  

There are also some things I feel I need: 

1. Movement - I am starting to feel like an old person and move like one.  I also NEED to lose weight.  It's been packing on over the years and I need to change the way I eat.  
2. Reading - whether it's studying or just becoming more knowledgeable I feel as if this is something need to do.  
3. Time with Paul - I need to make sure I am prioritizing my time with my husband.  Why did I not list him as one of the things that makes me happy?  Our relationship has been put on the back burner lately and I'm starting to feel the effects.  I want to be happily married for a long time so this NEEDS to change.  
4. MEAL PLANNING - I need to get better at this.  I don't like to cook mostly because I feel like I don't really know how to make anything!  I need to get better organized at this so I'm making better choices and not 'figuring out' dinner at 5:30 pm each day.  (which usually means take out...AGAIN)
5. Work - I need to get research time and social media time and 'income-generating activities' into my work time.  
6. SCHEDULING - all of this leads up to this last one.  I need to create a schedule and STICK to it until it becomes habit!  

Okay speaking of work I have some work to do right now!  😊