Feeling Festive

This is our tree this year.  There are already presents under the tree.  Parker has done most of his shopping and even wrapped them!  I'll start wrapping in the coming days.  

We finally got the tree up and decorated.  I like to do it earlier in December because December 26th...that thing comes down!  I do love having the Christmas decorations up, however, I also like everything in it's place and with the tree up almost NOTHING in the family room is in it's proper place.  LOL  It's the OCD in me.  I haven't gotten any other decorations up yet.  But I'll do those this afternoon.  And some holiday baking.  I'll do shortbread for the cookie gift exchange.  

I just love how tacking and mismanaged this tree looks.  I always long for a stylized tree with a theme but I love all our sentimental decorations and the memories we go through each year when the tree is decorated.  I loved how Parker would explain what a certain decoration was from or what it meant to him.  It touches my heart that the kids love the same things that I do about Christmas.  

I love this time of year, but I'm also very aware of what's around the corner.  January and February are incredibly hard months for me.  They always have been.  I'd like to think that will eventually change but I've come to accept it for what it is and brace myself for the inevitable.  

I am most consistent with my medication in January and February, and I try to focus on getting outside when the weather cooperates and keep checking my own list of joyful activities I can do to keep my mind from going to the dark places it's likes to go to in those months.  I feel like I must have been a hibernating animal in a past life.  Because winter and I are just NOT friends.  I've tried.  I've bought the warm boots, the warm coats, the hats and mitts and the whole bit.  But I just cannot feel warm and happy in the winter.  

So for now, I'm focusing on being festive, getting my shit done.  Meeting Kathy and Linda for tea this afternoon, then I'm finishing our budget and getting dinner done. Then after dinner making shortbread!  Play the music loud baby!